Coping with the stress of parenting

Black parents and grandparents are especially vulnerable to the psychological stress associated with daily events that affect their lives [1]. According to some research [1], “assuming these responsibilities in a household where only one parent is present and being the head of the household can be stressful”.  Given the potential stress, it is important that Black parents take care of themselves. In this tool kit from the American Psychological Association, tips are offered on racial stress and self-care. 

What is Parenting Stress?
Parenting stress has been defined as a negative psychological response due to being a parent or caring for a child as a result of everyday events such as feeding, bathing, or managing behavior problems [2]. Parenting stress may be experienced by all parents, but research has shown that parenting stress can be more severe for parents of children who display difficult and challenging behaviors like hyperactivity, temper tantrums, non-compliance, or conduct problems. 

Coping with Parenting Stress
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In a previous blog for Psychology Today, 4 tips for managing parenting stress were discussed:

1. Seek professional help 
If you find yourself feeling overwhelmed, seek professional help from a psychologist or licensed mental health professional. Psychologists can be helpful to provide strategies to help you cope with life’s challenges. Additionally, they may be able to provide you with resources to help improve your child’s functioning and decrease problem behaviors that may increase parenting stress.  

2. Increase quality time with family
Find ways to do enjoyable activities with you and your family. By spending more quality time together, it improves the parent-child relationship. Furthermore, it is not helpful to overly focus on everything that is not going well in your child’s life. Even though it may be difficult to incorporate extracurricular activities into the family’s schedule, consider being creative by having a family game night or engage in other activities that your child enjoys. 

3. Make time for yourself 
Many parents of children with special needs or mental health conditions have a hard time taking a break. This may be partly due to the time required to care for your child. However, many also feel they need permission to have some alone time. It is okay to take a break for yourself. It’s actually healthy and more beneficial for you and your child to have some time apart. 

4. Use your support systems 
It is extremely important to make use of your support systems. Having social support is very helpful to decreasing parenting stress. For example, if extended family is available ask them to provide child care for a few hours during the week so you can engage in self-care. Support systems may also be helpful to provide an avenue for you to talk with others about how they cope with being a parent. It is always good to hear how others have addressed a problem or find that you are not alone. 

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Written by Erlanger “Earl” Turner, Ph.D.

Sources: 
[1] Taylor, J. Y., Washington, O. G., Artinian, N. T., & Lichtenberg, P. (2007). Parental stress among African American parents and grandparents. Issues in Mental Health Nursing, 28(4), 373-387.
[2] Barroso, N. E., Mendez, L., Graziano, P. A., & Bagner, D. M. (2018). Parenting stress through the lens of different clinical groups: A systematic review & meta-analysis. Journal of Abnormal Child Psychology, 46(3), 449-461.

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